Last-Minute Trip

Last Sunday, late in the evening, I blurted out to Sam, "I need away from here!" While I tried to keep my composure, I couldn't help but cry. There's nothing wrong with life in particular at the moment (well, except for my continued struggle with getting the scale to move in my favor again), but I was feeling entirely pent up and depressed. I couldn't tell you what it was specifically I was depressed about, but I knew that my mental sanity was beginning to suffer. There are various factors that aren't important at the moment, but really it's nothing more than most people struggle with every day. "Why don't you just go out 'home' for a bit?" Sam responded. I had started looking at flights and the reality was that it's not as though this was planned, and with the Beetle project still underway, spending any extra money to take a frivolous trip to California seemed silly. "I can go later," I finally said... though I couldn't help but continue to look at flights. "It's just not good timing at the moment."

The surfers out, early in the day

As luck would have it, I found a super cheap flight that left early Tuesday morning. "Maybe I should just go?" I said out loud. After some discussion, Sam reassured me that nothing was going to suffer if I left for a few days, and maybe it would be good to just get away from everything and everyone for a bit. It helps that we have family there so we don't have to pay for a place to stay, too. It was just going to be me on this trip, but I knew I needed to get away and just sort some things out in my mind.

Reflection time needed

I wish I could explain all of the weird "coincidental" happenings that led up to this trip, but it would make me sound even crazier than I actually am; however, I will say it was an incredible experience and a great time for reflection and renewed determination to find my place. Oddly, I left crying and came home crying, but for very different reasons.

A lot of boats sitting unused, but at least it provides jobs for some.

The details of the trip aren't important to anyone except me, but I thought I'd share some of the sights as I enjoyed being able to visit "home" again (and for anyone who, like us is living with much cooler temps and/or snow). I'm also continually baffled by how anyone survives in the state of California unless they are born into a great deal of money, or have a job that pays phenomenally well. There is a part of me that will always miss living in that part of the country - I am definitely a beach girl at heart. The analytical side of me cannot help but wonder how anyone survives in that area though. I wonder what they do to make a living, and still ask if it's worthwhile to live there and have to work so much that one cannot even enjoy the location itself, or be forced out into the dessert-like areas and not even have the beaches easily accessible?  I suppose it's all about what one is willing to sacrifice to live in the area, which is true of many places across this nation.

The Amtrak train came through just perfectly... seems like a nice view on the way to work?

I won't lie... the weather is an exceptional reason to want to be there. I arrived to 70+ degree (Fahrenheit) days in the middle of January. Seriously. When I left home, it was negative 3 degrees. I instantly recalled that this is one of the beautiful reasons to live in the area. It doesn't hurt that my in-laws live on a presidio where there are exceptional views of some of the most southern portions of Orange County. I spent quite a few hours on their back deck just taking in the calmness, the view, and trying to will myself not to want to come back and live in this place. I'm still not opposed to being a beach bum and playing spoons for cash. {smile}

One of the beautiful sunset views I experienced. I'm still not sure why I came home. 

Maybe it's so enjoyable because it is time away from the norm? Perhaps it wouldn't be as relaxing in the day-to-day drudgery? I know that while living there I never had these sorts of views from home (nor would I at this point in life), but I think the fact that it was easy to get to and that I used the beach as my personal thinking and reflection spot has caused me to wonder if it was wise to ever leave in the first place? I love our home in Colorado, and I love that bike riding is so easy here. I don't worry (very often, anyway) about getting mowed down by vehicular traffic the way I would in California, and we have such easy access to a lot of great activities. It's more affordable, and in many ways, more laid-back. In the end, I came back home knowing that I love both places and am thankful that I had the opportunity to get away - but I was even more happy to get back to my family here in Colorado.