Goodbye, Colorful Colorado; Hello, Golden State

The last week or so has been a little chaotic and dramatic in our household, and it doesn't look to be shaping up any time in the near future. As noted a couple of days ago, Sam went for an interview in San Francisco last week. All went well, and the company offered him the position before he'd even left the building. We had lengthy discussions about the pros and cons of accepting the offer, and after a lot of tears and talking, late Monday evening, the decision was made to let the offer go. I think we both felt relieved in some sense, but also a bit disappointed that Sam wouldn't be pursuing such a wonderful career opportunity. However, the company wasn't going to give up on Sam without a fight, and as they continued to pursue Sam, they sweetened the deal even more. At this point, it would have been incredibly difficult to continue to decline... and so, he accepted a very exciting opportunity on the west coast.

*Image found here

What does this mean for us? Well, for starters we are going to have a very quick reminder of just how expensive housing is in California (as well as the high cost of many other necessities), but it also means we'll be renting out our "forever house" here in Colorado and attempting to get an entire household packed up and moved in about two weeks. My mind is reeling, spinning out of control. There are so many unfinished projects around the house that I honestly don't even have time to be typing this out, but it's also the quickest way I know to tell as many people as possible without having to restate the story a hundred times.

As with any change, there is good and bad with this move. I am sad to be leaving a community that I have grown fond of. I will miss the ease of bicycling in this area as well. Oh, we'll adjust to a busier atmosphere, and I'm sure it will become old hat in no time at all, but I've realized just how easy it is to get around in this area by bike - even in the winter, as I've just recently ventured out on a snow ride. I will miss the happy bird that whistles every morning, looking for its partner. I'll miss the people we've had the opportunity to get to know, and even some of the ones we don't know very well, but who still made an impact on our (my) life. I'll miss attempting to get some kind of garden going in the yard, the squirrels that heckle the dogs each morning,  the train honking its horn several times a day, and many, many other things.

This photo was taken almost 20 years ago on a trip to visit a friend living in Sonoma, CA - who would've thought I'd be living in this area nearly two decades later?

With the downside though, comes good and positive change. For instance, I will no longer worry about snow in the winter and spring. So, we may be in for more rain than we get here, but I'll take that as a positive. We will be closer to family (though I haven't quite determined yet if this is a positive or not :O)). We will be close to good public transportation... and perhaps even more exciting to me, we will be extremely close to the beach again (even though I am aware that this part of the state isn't as sunny as other regions). In addition, Sam's career is in for a definite, and much-needed shake up, and I will find my way in the slew of artists in that part of the country... I'm actually looking forward to it.

As for the blog here, I am supposing posts may end up being a bit sporadic until we are settled in to a new spot. For the time being, when Sam arrives in California, he will be staying in an extended stay location in SF, while I will be a couple hundred miles south at my moms home with our dogs, until we secure an actual place to live.  I'm sure that is going to bring its own challenges, but we know what we are in for and are embracing the experience. I know our relationship is strong, and while we will miss being together every day, the ultimate outcome will be a great one. I continue to remind myself that we just cannot know where life is going to take us, and we could end up back here in Colorado quite easily. This is just one of those opportunities that has to be acted on to see what might be possible.  I truly believe it is going to be a wonderful, positive experience. I look forward to the road ahead and the adventures that await us.

"Change. It happens every day, every moment, everywhere. To live fully, we must learn to embrace change and honor it, even when change arrives with the companions of fear and uncertainty." - Unknown

On the Move?

Last week, I had a planned trip to go and visit my mother in California. It had been planned for several months, so there was nothing out of the ordinary about the visit. However, my mother and I sometimes find it challenging to get along. Even though we both love each other, the visit started off rocky (mental note: don't expect people to change who they are), but we started to find somewhat of a groove toward the end of the visit. It was nice to get out of the snow for a bit and see some warmer temperatures, certainly, but the trip almost warrants an actual vacation just to recover from a lot of what transpired.

Those aren't rocks...I distracted myself with the massive amounts of Elephant Seals on the beach

Adding to some of the strain during the visit, prior to my departure, Sam received news that a company in San Francisco wanted to speak with him about a job opportunity in that area. He had a couple of phone interviews and it was looking like they wanted to have him come out and visit in person. So, while I was in California, Sam made his own quick trip to the City by the Bay to see if this opportunity could be a good career move. It turns out they wanted to make him an offer on the spot. 

I think we've both gone through a range of emotions. The opportunity is a fabulous one for Sam's career (and let's face it, being an artist and living near San Francisco isn't too shabby for me either), and as much as I will admit I've pushed at times to get back to the west coast, I've realized that we both consider where we are now to be home. Has too much time passed? Have we aged and now settled into a routine? Maybe we just actually like where we live, even if we don't readily see it that way all the time? As much as I want to ease both of our minds with a decision, I don't know if there really is a "right" answer to this question. Either decision will result in some feelings of loss. If he takes the job, we'll feel as though we're leaving our home; if he doesn't take the job, there will be those "I should have" feelings that undoubtedly surface. Honestly, although we've discussed both possibilities, my thoughts on the choice, and what we would do there ad nauseum, I truly believe this is his decision to make. That, however, doesn't prevent me from driving myself insane.

I find that I can very quickly and easily switch into the mindset of either option. I think about the move and know that it will have its challenges (including the dogs and I living with my mother for a yet-to-be-determined time frame), but also that it's an incredible opportunity to pursue (as in, we have no idea if this sort of opportunity would ever present itself again) and a potentially great place for me to be career-wise as well. In the abstract, it's easy to wish for something, but when it's actually happening, something seems to change and the reality of everything starts to sink in to the equation. It's no longer an "if," or an arbitrary daydream; this is concrete, and real, and very much possible. I'm unfocused/distracted, unable to do much of anything, and just wanting to know what is going to happen (at least in the short term). It's one of the few decisions in our life together that I've wondered if there really is a "better" or "right" choice between the two options.

Ultimately, we are living in a bit of unknown for the time being, but I believe that the decision will make itself apparent, and soon. Either option has unknown possibilities and potential greatness, just as there is something to lose with either choice. I can't help but leave this brief post with a few quotes that are running through my mind:

"Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Sir, What is the secret of your success?" a reporter asked a bank president.
"Two words," he replied.
"And, sir, what are they?"
"Good decisions."
"And how do you make good decisions?"
"One word."
"And sir, what is that?"
"Experience."
"And how do you get experience?"
"Two words."
"And, sir, what are they?"
"Bad decisions." - Unknown

"When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. We must decide whether or not to accept our destiny." - Paulo Coelho

It's That Time Again: Venus de Miles 2012

As long time readers already know, this is the time of year I generally start blabbing about doing the Venus de Miles ride. While I should be deep in to training at this point (considering it is exactly one month away), I am debating what to do and whether or not to participate at all this year. This would be year number three for me, and while I thoroughly enjoyed the first year of the ride, last year was not horribly pleasant and I pretty much proclaimed that I would not do it again, despite my desire to support Greenhouse Scholars. While you are free to read the posts for each year, I can summarize the first year by stating that it was like meeting a bunch of new friends and just enjoying a ride, contrasted with last year which was mostly like being berated by total strangers for no apparent reason (I wish I was exaggerating).

*Image from Venus de Miles

Enter the current year. I said I wasn't going to do the ride, and I've pretty well stuck to my guns thus far, but as I feel it getting closer, I find myself saying things like, "Well, it could be fun like the first year," or "Maybe the group will be less irritable this time?" Perhaps the biggest reason I'm considering doing the ride again is that I have been attempting to do some longer rides over the past couple of weeks, and it gives me a goal to shoot for. While the ride isn't a race necessarily, and there aren't "winners," I seem to do better with forcing myself to ride when I know there is a goal that is quickly approaching.

There are reasons not to participate, such as the glaring sun and heat that will undoubtedly be a part of that day (I swear, we get the hottest day of summer during the VdM ride), and I have to actually prep myself pretty quickly to do the ride (I have choices though as there is a 33, 51, 67, or 100 mile ride - heads up y'all - I will not be doing the 100 mile, regardless).

And so, my friends (and those who just read here, but certainly have no desire to be my friend), I am once again looking for advice. What would you do? Do you think it makes sense to just do the ride and see how it goes? After all, I did have fun at one point doing the ride... or, would you sit it out and look for something else to challenge you on the bike, and avoid the chaos and possibility of cranky folks on two wheels? Thoughts, ideas, opinions are all certainly welcomed.

Painting the Sam Hillborne: Color Suggestions?

The topic of bicycle color has definitely come up here prior to today, but I am currently debating colors to paint the Sam Hillborne, so it has become more personal at the moment. When I bought the frame, I was having trouble finding one in a small enough size to fit me, and the one partner of Rivendell who had the appropriate sized frame had already built it up as a bike.  The owner of the shop indicated that it would probably save me money to just purchase the whole bike from him, but I can be stubborn and had dreams of picking everything out for myself, so I declined his offer. He warned that the frame would likely have paint chips around eyelets and such due to removal of racks, etc. I assured him that it wasn't an issue, and regardless of whether I had purchased the bike whole or not, it would have needed to be disassembled for shipment, so I can't very well blame my stubbornness for the paint chipping off the bike.

There is a very small chip in the paint on the seat tube in this picture, however,
most of the major ones seem to be on the alternate side of the Hillborne.

When the frame arrived, there were indeed many paint chips on eyelets from removal of the prior parts, however, I knew that they would be covered for the most part by items I would be attaching. I had actually inquired about touch up paint from Riv, but that was not a possibility. Unfortunately, the paint on the rest of the frame soon began flaking off on its own (I don't know if this was merely a fluke with this bike's paint - others have said they've had no problems with theirs, and I've had no issues with the Betty thus far). For the first several months of ownership I didn't let anyone near this bike, I babied it as though it were a - well, baby - and never did anything harsh or abusive to the frame (not that I abuse it now, but I'm less fanatical around the bike as I realize it is still just a bike - regardless of what I may want to believe - you know, that it has mystical powers, makes me look better, etc).  At this point, there are several places that the paint has come off that are visible on the frame (some of them quite large), and since it is steel, I don't want it to get to the point that it begins to rust. Not to mention, I was never particularly in love with the color of this bike, so it seems a good time to start thinking about color change. In some ways I am happy that it needs paint because I can justify changing the color sooner than seems reasonable, but it's actually created quite a dilemma.

I thought that I knew the color that I wanted to paint the bike - I've had it picked out in my mind for over a year now - but as I think about it more and look at color options, I can see things going in two ways. First option: keep things more muted, classic, and understated (this was the original idea), or (second option) perhaps it is better to try out something bright? In some sense, I find that I'm more visible because of the orange color (even when there isn't as much light out), so perhaps going brighter makes more sense?

RAL 4009 - A lavender/gray-ish color to keep it looking classic

I tend to be drawn to very brightly colored bikes, but I appreciate the subtly in more muted colors as well. It's a little disturbing to be drawn to such different colors... but it's fun to think about what the Hillborne would look like with each of the different possibilities.

RAL 1016 - Maybe bright yellow is the way to go?

There are so many options to choose from that I find it difficult to make a decision, so I know I will hold off until I'm certain of the direction I want to go. But, when you have a chart of colors to pick from, it's difficult to narrow things down it seems.

RAL color chart - so many colors!

I find that I am fond of many different options, but I'm curious, if you were going to paint your bike, what color would you choose? Do you prefer the more muted tones, or would you opt for a brighter option? And, of course, if you'd like to offer suggestions for the Hillborne specifically, I'm all ears... err, uh, eyes.