I very intentionally started the five month project on the first of April. I didn't want to spend another birthday feeling the way I had been, and since my birthday is today, I wanted it to be one that I would remember for accomplishments, rather than failures. In truth, I had started this project about three weeks prior to my announcement here, and I felt I had a good jumpstart with losing some weight to carry it on for a more extended period of time. Ultimately, I was feeling confident that I could make some life changes, and just needed a place to see it in black and white. I started out with mini-goals for each month and set out to achieve them, most of which I accomplished (though perhaps not exactly in the time frames originally specified).
|And another - because one just isn't humiliating enough|
There have definitely been a lot of ups and downs with each day (sometimes, each hour). I went to try on some pants about a week ago because those I have currently are large in the waist. Unfortunately, everything I tried on was absolutely absurd. It varied from super tight in the legs and huge in the waist, to flat out not fitting even well enough to get over my thighs. I couldn't help but think, "I must be the only person who can lose this amount of weight, and still not be able to find things that fit...or better yet, still be wearing the same clothes." It's frustrating, to say the least. I know I have to not allow these types of things to get to me, but it can be challenging. Beyond the clothing, there are just mental happenings that tend to mess with me on a more routine basis, but I'm slowly trying to work through it.
I am nowhere near my ultimate goal, but I do think I have learned a bit over the last several months - some things the easy way, and others, well, not as easily. I'm a bit hard-headed at times, so some things take time to sink in. A few of the things that have stuck with me that seem to have helped:
- It doesn't have to be an "all or nothing" kind of mentality, and I don't have to cut out every food. Moderation in everything is key, and making this a change in life rather than viewing it as a diet (which it's not) has been so beneficial.
- Finding an activity that I love to do was extremely important. I love to ride, and was doing so throughout, but I just seemed to need more. For me, kickboxing was that "thing." I honestly don't know what I would do without it now (but never fear - bicycles and cycling abound in the E.V.L. household).
- Having a support system is absolutely essential. It doesn't matter who or where it comes from, but having someone to vent to/cry with/join me on the journey has been a godsend... and I'm very lucky to have many "someone's" to talk to.
- Perhaps the biggest lesson has been to not focus on the weight loss itself. It's definitely tough when all I want to see is my body shrinking, but being able to find other little things to distract me has been extremely beneficial.
I am not even close to the end of my journey, but this has been a great start. I feel stronger than I have in a very long time (maybe even in my life), and I feel confident that I can keep moving forward, even if it's not at breakneck speeds. Although this will be my last update here, I may throw something up once in awhile just to check in, but I promise to keep it to a minimum. If anyone is interested in starting up a new challenge, feel free to send an email, and if there's interest, I'm happy to put something together.
Again, thank you to all for tolerating my updates over the last several months. If you've been silently participating in a self-project, I'd love to hear how you've been doing as well, so feel free to leave a comment or drop me a note.